boys vs. men

I’m done with boys. 

Last night my fake boyfriend invited me to a party for an app he invested in, so like a good fake girlfriend I got all dressed up and went with him. I call him my fake boyfriend because we dated last year and even though he has a girlfriend in Puerto Rico now we still fulfill that mutual need for opposite sex energy. 

To be honest I thought I was totally okay with this agreement. Until last night. He was the guy I could call when my car was acting up (or for any of that man shit I sadly know nothing about) and he called me to cuddle and look good on his arm at parties. 

 I really thought we had the perfect friendship until I drank some wine last night and started realizing shit. 

He’s always talking about how hard it is to be in the same room with me because I’m so attractive but he has a girlfriend now, and my dumbass kept thinking, “how stupid, but cute.” Then last night (and I take full responsibility) after a few glasses of wine and everyone thinking we were married I tried to kiss him on the way home. And he stopped me, because of his girlfriend in Puerto Rico. 

Long story short, I found out last night that we met a day after he came back from a trip there. So this entire time I’ve been the asshole. Thinking we broke up and then he went and met her and fell in love, when really he knew her first. And maybe I’m just being dramatic but I’m so beyond tired of guys choosing me second and making it seem like my fault. 

If he wants to date a 21 year old instead of me, fine. But don’t make me feel guilty for going through a rough patch and needing room and you circling back around to that young, hot girl. I’m not second choice. I’m not here to be your surrogate girlfriend because you’re lonely. That’s not my job. It’s not fair for you to dangle yourself in front of me and then when I finally fall for the bait you say “woah woah I have a girlfriend, you had your chance.” 

So here’s to being single until I find someone who puts me at the top of their list. Team First Place back in full effect. Nobody is worth lowering my standards for. And if that means I’m single forever then bring it on. Like Beyoncé said “Me, myself, and I. That’s all I got in the end. That’s what I found out. And it ain’t no need to cry; I took a vow that from now on I’m gon’ my own best friend.”

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