realizing shit. 

So last night I went out with my girls. We ate some good food, drank delicious wine, and then went to dance and drink more. I had so much fun drinking the delicious drinks and dancing to my favorite nasty ass rap songs. 

I even had some encounters with people from the past. Then today I woke up and was like wait… why did I spend all that money and do some things that weren’t “bad,” but maybe weren’t the best for me.  

So today I was thinking a lot about why I’m different when I drink (most people are,  right?) and not even in a bad way, just not the same goals and things I’m searching for in sober life, and I finally realized! 

Drunk Phoebe is all those subconscious voices inside that I don’t pay attention to anymore, because they’re working against my goals. They’re the parts of me I’ve learned to realize aren’t really ME. They’re the old me. The wounded parts of me continuing those same patterns that I’ve consciously learned to not participate in. 

Not that I’m saying drinking is bad (alcohol isn’t good or bad it’s just doing what it does), but a nice glass of wine with some high fat, high protein meal is all that fits with everything I’m working to bring into existence in my life right now. 

So glad to be consciously becoming aware of behaviors that are holding me back from manifesting my highest goals! 

Realizing shit man. Lol.